Donor Letter

I took off some time yesterday to spend alone and write the letter to the Kyle's heart donor family. After a year the letter can be sent to them. I purposely waited until now to write this letter. I wanted to give myself time for the emotions to settle and to give them a full year view of how much better Kyle is now. The letter we be sent out on Monday and then forwarded to them after the one year mark. I thought I would share it here:



Dear Donor Family,

I am sure this letter may be difficult to read. It is difficult for me to write. It is both painful and joyous. I know I may only have one chance to write to you and it is important to me to get it right. The reason I am writing is to thank you.

Kyle is our 14 year old son. Almost a year ago your donation saved his life. Kyle was born with a congenital heart defect. He had his first surgery at 4 weeks of age and had a heart valve replacement at 11 months. This was a temporary fix that would buy him time until he would again need another open heart surgery as a teenager. Last fall at the age of 13 we knew we were getting closer to having that surgery as he became more ill. To the surprise of the doctors his heart condition was much worse than they had imagined and open heart surgery would not be enough to save him. We were sent 400miles away to another Children’s Hospital and after being evaluated we were told that Kyle’s only option was a heart transplant. He and I were required to stay in that area until a new heart would become available. His condition deteriorated quickly. His heart was failing. He no longer had energy to do much. Walking a few blocks made him extremely short of breath. His appetite decreased and he slept more than usual. I watched helplessly as his health failed. On several occasions he and I had very in depth talks about life. A couple times he asked me if he was going to die. I did not know how to answer him but did the best I could. Since October 8, 2008 when Kyle was placed on the transplant list our family experienced many feelings. I was very torn. I prayed for Kyle to get better but did not want another family to suffer. I only asked God that if it happened, that the family would be brave enough to donate and Kyle would be a match. Kyle received his heart December 4, 2008. I cried that day. I cried for joy for my son but also because I knew that on that day some where a family lost a precious beloved person in their lives.

After the transplant Kyle had some complications early on with rejection. He also had some trouble with a rapid and irregular heart beat which required an ablation in February. Since then though he has been doing wonderful. In less than a year he has grown about 2 inched and gained about 33 lbs. He has more energy and can run now like never before. He has got the OK to play high school basketball which will start here next week.

During this past year we look back and reflect. There were so many fears and uncertainties we all felt. We watched our son’s health deteriorate, watched him suffer and then watched him rejoice and now flourish as health and new life have came back to him. He is a wonderful boy who has a great sense of humor and loves to laugh. He loves sports, especially football and basketball. He loves the outdoors, farming, fishing and animals. My husband and I tried so hard to prepare him and our family for all of this as it unfolded. In the end we realize that Kyle taught us so much more than we ever taught him. He taught us about bravery, faith, not dwelling on the bad and living each day to the fullest. He has astounded us with his attitude and we are so proud of him. Our family is forever changed thanks to your donation of life. Your courage in the face of loss has given Kyle a chance at a new life.

Your loved one has become our hero and angel. Her gift of life has touched and inspired so many. I pray for your family daily. There are many more thoughts and feelings I would love to share with you. We would love to meet you someday if you like and hear more about your loved one. Even if we never meet please know we will honor her and her gift of life by taking good care of our son and celebrating life.

With love,
Marilyn, Kenton, Jessica and Kyle

Fall Pictures

The weather hasn't been the best for me to get out and take some fall pictures. Lots of rain last week and the leaves have just fallen off the trees. I did get the kids outside today for a few shots. They are wearing their Bedford Bulldog attire which is fitting as school plays such a big part of our lives right now.
Hard to believe how much they have grown in a year, especially Kyle. He is now officially taller than Kenton and I. I think he is pretty proud of that. We continue to pray that we all stay healthy. We hope all of you are staying healthy too. Keep washing your hands!

Fall is Here

So far it has been a rather cool and wet fall here in Iowa but hopefully this week that will change. I have a love-hate relationship with fall. I love the colors and usually nicer fall weather but hate what is to come-winter. I hate being cold. Right now we are just trying to enjoy each ordinary day. It sounds so good to have ordinary days once again. Last year this time our days were not so ordinary as we were in St. Louis waiting for Kyle's new heart. Hard to believe a year has come and gone. Time goes so fast. I found a short little book I pick up a few years ago by Anna Quindlen, A Short Guide to a Happy Life.

I love this exert from the book:
"Life is made of moments, small pieces of glittering mica in a long stretch of gray cement. It would be wonderful if they came to us unsummoned, but particularly in lives as busy as the ones most of us lead now, that won't happen. We have to teach ourselves how to live, really live...to love the journey, not the destination."

It is a good reminder to try and enjoy each day!

Saying Goodbye

Yesterday we had to say goodbye our sweet dog, Ralph.

Kenton actually got him as a puppy in 1995 around the same time he bought the farm. When the kids and I moved here in 2000 we quickly became attached to him. He loved the kids and being with them.

He even enjoyed being outside in the snow with his family.

Ralph enjoyed farming with Kenton. He would jump in the back of the pickup truck and loved to ride along. If Kenton was here at home working, Ralph was with him. If we were in the yard working, mowing or playing Ralph was there with us barking at the birds chasing them from tree to tree.

He was 14 years old or 98 years old in "dog years". Arthritis had been settling in for the past few years and it was getting harder for him to get around. Over the past month he began losing weight and wouldn't eat. He was getting weaker as the weeks progressed but seemed to still be enjoying life. He would still come to meet us as we drove into the driveway. But the last two days we noticed that he was getting sicker. Kenton called me Friday morning to tell me that Ralph was vomiting the having difficulty standing. We decided as a family that we could not let him suffer. Jessica stayed outside with him for some time before the vet came Saturday afternoon. She sat with his head in her lap.

The four of us were with him when he went peacefully asleep. Later we buried him at the edge of the yard next to the tree line he loved to run through. No doubt, sadness will dwell in our house for awhile. I never knew how hard it was to have your beloved pet die. We will all miss him.

I looked for some profound words to say about Ralph but nothing seemed quite right but this simple quote:

"A person who has never owned a dog has missed a wonderful part of life."
(Bob Barker)

Ralph was a wonderful part of our lives. We loved him as he did us. He will never be forgotten.

New Glasses and the Broncos Won

Kyle got glasses this week. He doesn't need to wear them all the time but will need them to drive with. He looks so handsome in them. He has grown up so much this past year. His voice is deeper, he is taller and he has gained weight. He is keeping up with the rest of the freshman kids quite well. He specifically wore his Bronco's jersey today, as he says it brings them good luck on game day and it must have, as they won again. Bedford had Homecoming on Friday night and won their game. It is hard to keep up with 2 teenagers in the house. Lots of activities and things going on. We are so thankful to be home and healthy almost one year to when we left for St. Louis.

It is Not All About Winning

During a football game last week two rival football teams from NW Missouri did something great for one special player. Please check out the link below and read the article if you haven't already heard about it. It reminds us all that it is not all about winning!
http://www.kansascity.com/934/gallery/1452386.html

Sunday Photo Shoot

The weekend went fast but I did get out to get some pictures taken again. I got a new model today. Our friends' daughter, Shelby, is a senior this year and we spent the afternoon together taking some pictures. Shelby and Jessica are good friends and spend a lot of time together. Shelby was so patient with me and my lack of experience at taking pictures. She is a beautiful girl and very photogenic. We ended up taking a lot of pictures but we were having so much fun we just couldn't stop.

The light was probably too bright in this last one but I still thought it turned out neat.

The afternoon got my creative juices flowing and I would love to stay up working on some scrapbooking and photography stuff but not enough time. We have another busy week planned with ballgames and appointments. Everyone is well and will continue to keep our fingers crossed that we avoid the flu.

Thanks again Shelby for a fun afternoon!